Friday Newsletter: May 25, 2012

This week there are fast cars and slow drivers – well one car which was faster than the driver.

Then in another motoring story there is one car and 40 baboons.

We also learn what could happen if you call a horse ‘gay’ and say ‘woof’ to a dog in modern Britain.

Oh and there is a cute dog who is a Facebook star so take a look around and see what interests you.

Well you did want people to notice as you raced away from the traffic lights in your yellow Lamborghini

We all hate waiting at traffic lights but no matter how much you rev your engine and no matter how impatient you are, the lights will not change to green any faster.

This guy, in Chicago, was particularly anxious to get past this set of lights:

I bet you can guess what happened next.

But you don’t have to guess. Watch this:

Video credit: DrCinadr/YouTube

 

Oh Surfer, your tweets are so funny, and not even slightly sarcastic.

There is a new voice in the Twittersphere which should be of interest to traffic exchange users.

According to his profile page, ‘Condescending Surfer’ says: “I surf traffic exchanges and tweet about the horrible business decisions people make!”

You can send suggestions for Tweets to the following email: submit@ohsurfer.com

Oh and before you ask. Condescending Surfer is not me.

Why, in Britain, it is now an offense to call a police horse gay.

In the UK these days it is very easy to fall foul of the law simply by speaking your mind.

Thanks to the Public Order Act even teasing other people could be enough to get you charged with a criminal offense.

Section 5 of the above Act says that you are guilty of an offense if you use:

• ‘threatening, abusive or insulting words or behaviour’ or if you
• ‘display any writing [or] sign…which is threatening, abusive or insulting, within the hearing or sight of a person likely to be caused harassment, alarm or distress.”

In other words if behave in any way at all which might cause anybody else alarm or distress you can be charged under the Public Order Act.

The problem is that police have been very quick to charge people under this Act for the most trivial of matters.

Take these recent examples:

• A student from Oxford University was arrested, locked up overnight in police cells and brought before the magistrates the next morning after a mounted police officer took offense to the following words:

“Excuse me, do you realize your horse is gay?”

• A Christian street preacher was charged after he told a passer-by that he thought homosexuality was a sin.

• A 16-year-old boy was arrested, charged and fined £200 (US$316) for saying “woof” to a labrador dog within earshot of a police officer.

I have honestly not made any of this up. Now politicians are being urged to amend this absurd law.

As Daily Mail Parliamentary sketchwriter Quentin Letts observed: “Section 5 of the Public Order Act ignores the reality of the public square — the fact that human beings will always express their views, will always gossip, will always complain.

“Let natural justice prevail. Let the truth of the insult, or otherwise, be weighed in the balance by public opinion. That is the court where such matters should be decided.”

Quite right Mr Letts.

Quite right indeed.

This dad can dance…but he is even better known as a stand-up comedian

When Jessica and her proud father Mike Hanley took to the dance floor at her Bat Mitzvah, the guests might not have predicted what happened next.

Instead of the usual awkward father and daughter dance the pair move to a medley of songs including hits by Michael Jackson, Madonna and Lady GaGa.

 

Video credit: standupmikehanley/Youtube

Hey Teachers…Leave Those Kids Alone

Pupils are asking their teachers to stop sending them exam tips through text, Facebook and Twitter…because the constant interruptions are stopping them off studying for their exams.

They say the ‘top revision tips’ which include hints such as “try your best right from the start” are actually distracting them when they try to revise.

Students at Havering Sixth Form College in Hornchurch, Essex, say the messages are ‘obvious’ and ‘annoying’ and are no help at all with their A-level preparation.

Some of the other daily tips have included:

• ‘buckle down and try your best right from the start’
• ‘make sure you are revising all your subjects – plan your time, do not waste a minute’
• ‘work now and you’ll reap the benefits later’ and
• ‘you can work and play but you need the correct balance.’

Student Khloe Walters tweeted last week: ‘Wish Havering sixth form would stop texting me tbh.’

Fellow student James Welsh tweeted ‘Very inspirational text from Havering Sixth Form – ‘every minutes counts’ apparently.’

Principal Paul Wakeling said the campaign had been positively received and added: ‘Most of the students seem to really like it. Some have said they don’t like it coming to their mobile phone and others say they do.”

Jane Button, the college’s leader in learner services, added: ‘We have introduced texting and daily tips on Facebook and Twitter because social networking is now a part of every young person’s life.”

 

What happens when you take one gleaming new car and introduce it to 40 baboons

Well Korean car maker Hyundai decided it would be a good idea to find out.

So they arranged for their new i30 hatchback to be driven into the baboon enclosure at Knowsley Safari Park in Merseyside and left it unattended and unlocked for ten hours.

Apparently the design team wanted to see how the car’s finish would stand up to the punishment that an average child might inflict during its lifetime and the baboons were only too willing to help out.

After ten hours there were smears and finger marks on all the windows, a few scrapes, a dislodged rubber door seal, bite marks on the steering wheel and other minor damage.

Hyundai’s project manager Felicity Wood said: “Safari park monkeys are particularly good at discovering weak points on cars and then pulling, prodding and tearing at the parts until they break.”

This is what happened:

Video credit: officialcarsuk/YouTube

 

Is Boo the world’s cutest dog?…4.3million Facebook fans seem to think so

A couple of weeks ago we had a very cute gray Russian cat on this newsletter.

After I featured it one of my subscribers asked me if I had heard of a cute dog called Boo. I had not.

Boo even has Facebook page. This is the header picture from his page – he sure is a cute dog indeed:

Now hands up anyone who wants to see a video of Boo trying to fall asleep.

Thought so.

Here it is.

Video credit: BIEBERproductions100/YouTube

Picture credit: Facebook.com/boo

And finally…

You have to admire militant feminists. I would take my hat off to them but I doubt they would approve.

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Have a good weekend and God bless.

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